Batman (1989)

The Batman's arch-nemesis known as the Joker arrives on the scene in Gotham City to cause chaos and ensure you never rub another man's rhubarb. Hilarity ensues as a man dressed as a giant rodent and a man dressed as a killer clown trade fisticuffs across the city. Bam! Zok! Kapow! Hold on to your butts, boys and girls, it's time to dance with the devil in the pale moonlight!

Fantasy author Craig Shaw Gardner was no stranger to making a quick buck from the film novelization back in the day. Also penning novelizations for Back to the Future Part II and The Lost Boys, Gardner was probably a safe pair of hands to pick to write the novelization for 1989's Batman. There was no guarantee that Batman was going to be the marketing and merchandising juggernaut it eventually did become, but with Jack Nicholson attached to the project for a while and an in-demand Tim Burton directing, there were obvious signs, so this book coming to pass when it did should surprise no one.

After a night at the opera goes horribly wrong and turns Bruce Wayne into an orphan, the grown multi-millionaire cum entrepreneur cum philanthropist cum aloof playboy begins a crusade of fighting criminal scum across the streets of Gotham City disguised as the Batman. The Batman soon crosses paths with Jack Napier, second-in-command of a group of local mobsters with their hands firmly in the pockets of the Gotham City Police. A police raid on Napier and his men at Axis Chemicals turns into a chaotic shootout and although Batman tries to save as many lives as possible, he inadvertently causes Napier to fall into a vat of acid that causes horrible scarring and chemical burns. Napier emerges and dubs himself 'the Joker' and vows revenge on Batman, Gotham City, the police, his former mob associates, and anyone and everyone in between. Meanwhile, an astute photo-journalist named Vicki Vale finds herself drawn into covering the discord surrounding Batman and the Joker's war. Vicki can't quite put her finger on it, but the handsome millionaire Bruce Wayne seems to be connected to this story somehow...

As with many novelizations, what will intrigue diehard fans of the film are the little bits and pieces from whatever draft of the script the author was working from that were either cut from the film or excised altogether before shooting began. For instance, we have a sequence where Bruce Wayne slips on a ski mask in broad daylight to hide his identity and ziplines around Gotham to chase after the Joker and his goons at one point. The existence of such a sequence lends credence to the notion that director Tim Burton was heavily influenced by Frank Miller comics at the time, because Bruce in an impromptu ski mask disguise is something seen in 1987's Year One (and later used by Christopher Nolan in his own loose interpretation of Year One, 2005's Batman Begins). There's also an extended date scene with Bruce and Vicki Vale which includes the infamous horse riding scene that actress Sean Young, originally cast as Vicki, was practicing for when she injured herself and had to drop out of the film. None of this bonus content is essential to the story, but if you're a fan it's nice to have an expansion to a story that we're already familiar with.

And familiar you will be if you've seen the film. Most of everything else on offer in Gardner's book is a close interpretation of what you saw on screen. Batman and Joker fighting in the bell tower? Check. The Joker and his goons raiding the art gallery? Check. Batman being a doofus and revealing the Batcave and his secret identity to the first skirt that flashes her eyes at him? Check.

All of the above would normally be perfectly fine, but this is a novelization that struggles somewhat simply because of the medium it's trapped in. Certain things that make the film version of Batman so cool and so memorable are things that can't really be translated into the written word. One can't exactly channel the iconic Danny Elfman score or the kitschy Prince songs into a book. Nor can they accurately show off Tim Burton's visual flair with the art deco backdrops or the particular rain soaked patina of the Gotham City streets. The Joker's lines of dialogue come across as flat without Jack Nicholson's over-the-top panache in delivering them.

As such, unless you're someone who already collects older film novelizations, I would only recommend Gardner's Batman to absolute diehard fans who want to tear through this as a random curio of the era.

Punisher: Suicide Run (2017; collecting comics from 1993-1994)

Frank Castle - The Punisher - has a cunning plan: use himself as bait to lure every possible criminal scum in the city into a skyscraper and then blow that son of a bitch to kingdom come faster than you can say "Building 7 of the World Trade Cen---" CANCELLED. In the wake of Punisher's apparent demise, pretenders to the throne of New York's primo vigilante arise - some good, some evil, and some living in the shades of grey. Everything soon culminates in a small-town shootout with the scattered remnants of the criminal gangs, the faux-Punishers, and maybe, just maybe, the real deal Punisher himself back from the dead. Behold, Frank Castle being rescued by a retarded child!

We need no introduction to the Punisher (who also happens to be my favorite comic book character). He's the guy who kills criminals and triggers all the right kind of snowflakes with his logo alone - including, it seems, his original creator, king cuck Gerry Conway. What a lame last name. 😏

Anyway, this compilation by the likes of Chuck Dixon and Steven Grant collects issues of the Punisher, Punisher War Journal, and Punisher War Zone comic book lines and catalogues the aforementioned 'suicide run' gambit of one Frank Castle as he attempts to take out most of the big players in the seedy underbelly of New York City in one fell swoop.

In some ways, the "Suicide Run" arc was Marvel's own stab at the copycat character craze that sold a lot of comics over at rival company DC Comics - the various 'Supermen' that appeared to try and take the original's place in the "Reign of the Supermen!" arc that followed the apparent death of Superman and also the pretenders to the mantle of the Batman in the Knightfall series after Batman is seemingly put out of commission for a time. Thus, in Punisher: Suicide Run, it's a slew of would-be Punishers: the British version of Punisher known as Outlaw, former cops Lynn Michaels aka 'Lady Punisher' and Edward Dyson aka Payback, rich media guy Dean Swaybrick (affectionally known as 'Yuppunisher'), the former Navy SEAL known as Hitman, and Desmond Kline, a former postal worker who goes, well... postal.

What's funny about Marvel's take on the copycat characters is none of them are treated as anything close to the real deal Punisher. In fact, I'd be so bold as to say most of the would-be Punishers are complete butt-monkeys as far as this story arc is concerned. One of them is permanently iced in possibly the most humiliating manner possible for a wannabe superhero approximately one page after he makes his big debut on the streets, while the likes of Dean Swaybrick does little more than cause trouble and make a fool of himself on prime time television. Perhaps the most time is dedicated to the pairing of Lynn Michaels and Payback, but after a brief moment of glory taking down some hoodlums they're rounded up by the vigilante hunting agency known as V.I.G.I.L. (some of the de-facto bad guys of this story arc), beaten and battered like there's no tomorrow, and then spend the rest of the story as scared lambs on the run - a devastatingly quick fall from grace.

Perhaps this was done to show that Frank Castle and Frank Castle alone is really the only guy resilient, crazy, and mentally scarred enough to take on the mantle of the Punisher and survive for longer than a few days. And the version of Castle we get here is indeed one tough son of a bitch. I enjoyed Frank being smug and self-assured during his insane escapades of gathering all of the gangs into the skyscraper before literally detonating the place, but I feel the character is actually at his best in the second half of the series. Bloodied but not beaten, Frank is paired up with the sheriff of a sleepy upstate town and is soon expressing himself with his favorite form of contemporary art: shotgun graffiti.

My biggest complaint about Punisher: Suicide Run is the inconsistent nature of the artwork. In part due to this series being a big crossover event that spanned three different comic books, it tapped into various illustrators throughout the run. In one issue you may find some spectacular pieces, but in the next issue you'll encounter some sloppy sketch style artwork that was passed off as finished work. It's a shame the entire series couldn't have the same art team, but such is the nature of comic books sometimes.

I know it was not exactly trendy to admit to enjoying early 90's cheese in comic books for several years, but seeing as how that's the era I first became interested in comics, I highly enjoyed the trip down memory lane back to this period. You will never forget you're in the 90's reading Suicide Run, from some of the garish color and fashion choices on characters (hello, flannel) to some particularly interesting digs at the Clinton administration (including a direct jab at the Waco massacre carried out by Slick Willie's goons). Remember when mainstream comics could actually be based? Who knew?!

Recommended.